Our mind is often a complex landscape where sometimes the biggest challenge to overcome is ourselves. A daily battle to overcome the negative thoughts that hold us back.
Negative thoughts often replicate and turn into worry. Worry that takes over to become an endless supply of fuel to fan the flames of anxiety.
I never used to feel like this, not consciously. When Naz was alive each day was an adventure. I used to wake up excited each day, looking forward to the day ahead… regardless of what I, or we, were going to be doing. Sure, I felt anxious sometimes, but it felt ‘normal’ and could be addressed or resolved peacefully.
But now the anxiety is a different beast. It uses privilege and inside knowledge to take control over the things in life I want to, and need to, do most. It’s an anxious beast holds me back and doesn’t want to let go.
The more I learn about the causes of anxiety, the more I see light at the end of the tunnel. The more I learn about my own anxiety, the more I can understand yours.
We will get there. We have to.